Monday, 12 May 2014

Guest Post from Alexi Dinks - MEaning of Life

MEaning of life is....

the worst ever flu' with nose and eye snot - then times it by 100

bed after Songs of Praise and calling it a night on the tiles

looking like Noddy on smack - without the smack

being plugged into the National Grid and looking epileptic

staggering off a roller-coaster and puking on new trainers

your memory foam mattress feeling full of rocks

a mole wearing shades "papped" by a thousand flash bulbs

walking a tightrope after 20 tequila slammers

gorging on chocolate with Mississippi mud pie for afters

having 70lb dumbbells attached to your arms all day every day

getting up after Bargain Hunt to get an early start

the sleep deprivation of a million new mums

IM /texts scrolling on their own because you are so bog-eyed

always getting your muckin' words fuddled up

trying to pluck your eyebrows wearing goalkeepers gloves

the accumulative hangover of 365 uni fresher days

running a marathon attached to a bungee rope

knowing last nights vindaloo was not a great idea

screaming at the churchyard mouse for making a racket

slapping the git who said "no man is an island"

leaving your libido on that gut-wrenching roller-coaster ride

morphing into Worzel Gummidge on a bad hair day

calling a NATO peace-keeping force to open a yoghurt carton

waking up paralysed and finding it isn't a dream

grappling with buttons and zips on The Krypton Factor

discovering the true meaning of IBS - inevitable bum squeak

Mindfulness Empathy Compassion Forgiveness Serenity (ME/CFS)

having these talents and using them with wisdom and humour

 by Alexi Dinks for #May12BlogBomb
with thanks to Wendy Boutilier for the image

1 comment:

  1. "getting up after Bargain Hunt to get an early start"

    Yes,I try to make sure I'm downstairs in time to catch the second half of Bargain Hunt (12.30pm -ish). Anything happening earlier than that is either essential or a surprise bonus.